Monday, 22 April 2013

Llandough Ludicrousness

Visit to a Wales' LEGOLAND

Last week I spent a few hours trying to find a parking space within the grounds of Llandough Hospital, which is more difficult than trying to find a hospital bed.  One thing they're not short of is earth-moving equipment.  Opposite the Merry Harriers a new off-road parking space borders a strange road that makes the face of Snowdonia look like a kiddie ramp - yet another example of the brilliance of local planning half-wits. As I drove the winding uphill route to Marathon, I passed the smartly laid out base camp of Laing O'Rourke, the main site contractor. I found the jovial site manager who looked like a man who had won the lottery.  After I introduced myself he told me that "We did millions of pounds worth of work preparing the site of the new Mental Health hospital at Whitchurch and now that's safely in the bank, we're waiting to see if the NHS get the money for the new Mental hospital."

"Where will you put it ?" I asked waving my hand over the thousand or so parked cars in front of us.
"Well, we're in the process of building a 150 capacity multi-storey car park where you see that crane working"

Without binoculars, it was difficult to see the solitary crane, high above the land opposite the old maternity unit.  Still smiling, my host continued his guide.  "Below that, we're building a flat car park out of the side of the hill..."

I had to choke back my laughter.

"Your joking, of course..." I spluttered,

"....that's further away than a man can walk"

Ignoring me, he waved his yellow coated arm back towards the vast field of cars in front of the new Elderly Mentally Ill Assessment Unit.

"The car park should be finished in September ( this year ! ), then we'll clear all of those cars out of the way, ready for the new Adult Mental Health unit - if they get the money, of course."

Following a short conversation - interspersed with many expletives at the stupidity of these 'plans', I thanked my jovial host and made my way back home, wondering with incredulity over where on earth the existing cars would be parked in future.  There wouldn't be enough spaces for the staff cars, let alone the staff and visitors when ( and if ) Rookwood Hospital is relocated, and when ( and if ) the new Mental Hospital is built.

Obviously, I don't have the vision or forethought of the mindless idiots of the NHS Planning Departments.  Really, they have GOT to be kidding.     R.   W.


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